The formation of the father’s role in Chinese society has a complex history. During the Qing Dynasty, a “good father” is an ideal Chinese man who is both literate and strong. He should be loyal to the country and protect his family. Later, before China’s agricultural reforms, the definition of a “good father” turned into a combination of personal virtues and family ethics from Confucianism, Taoism, and Buddhism. Different historical periods influenced how fathers think about themselves as a man, as a parent, and as a member of society.
A famous father figure in ancient Chinese history is Dou Yan Shan (窦燕山), who was known for his exemplary method of raising children. The story Dou Yan Shan was recorded in the traditional Confucian teaching called the “Three-Character Classic” (三字经). In the “Three-Character Classic,” it states, “Dou Yan Shan, has a righteous method, taught five sons, all excellent” (窦燕山，有义方；教五子，名俱扬).
Dou Yan Shan was born in the Five Dynasties Period. At the time, people usually had children before their thirties, but Dou Yan Shan still did not have any children. One night, he dreamed about his grandfather, who told him that he needs to atone for his misdeeds in order to have children. Dou Yan Shan kept his grandfather’s words in his heart, and swore to help other people and do no evil. He lent money to the poor so that they could start their business to make a living. He paid for coffins for those who have no money to bury their relatives.
In the end, Dou Yan Shan got five sons, and he devoted much of his attention to developing the characters of his children. By using his actions as a teaching method, he set an example for his sons. Through Dou Yan Shan’s hard work, all of his sons became famous scholars.
Dou Yan Shan’s hard work and good teaching as a father was praised by later generations. He set an example as an ideal father figure in a period of Chinese history. In the end, a father is an important figure in every household as he not only provides economic support but also educational guidance to his children. So on Father's Day this Sunday, don’t forget to give your father a hug.
